Tag Archives: cabin fever 2: spring fever

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever (2009)

So I’m not one of those people who likes sucking their thumb.  I don’t wear a nappy.  I don’t eat rusks.  I don’t piss myself.  I’m not immature in the slightest. I don’t go to playschool.  I don’t crawl around on all fours farting.  I don’t drink milk from women’s tits. I don’t have a pacifier. I don’t wander around naked. I don’t eat earthworms.  I am in control of when I shit.

Basically, all of the above means that obviously, I haven’t seen Eli Roth’s 2002 shit-seam of a horror movie Cabin Fever. However (with a capital fucking H) –

Actually, sod it.  That’s reminded me – if anyone fucking says ‘haych’ in front of me again, I’ll go apeshit.  HAYCH.  What the hell is HAYCH?

“I’m trying to look up Wishmaster on the internet – how do you spell it?”

“w, i, s, HAYTCH, m, a, s, t, e, r”

“WATCH ME PUT MY ARM UP YOUR ARSE YOU FUCKING DUNCE.”

(although of course I know how to spell Wishmaster, but you get the idea.)

(more…)

Posted in 18s, Horror, Reviews | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment