Tag Archives: ryan gosling

R.I.P Drive (1998): The End Of An Era

drive-cover

So as you all know, my favourite film of all time is Drive. No, not that one, the other one. The one from 1998 starring Mark Dacascos and Kadeem Hardison. If you want to know why, then read my original review here. I have also talked about it here (and if you fancy reading about what I think of the Gosling Drive, why not click here?). So yeah, I fucking like Drive (1998).

BUT NOT ANY FUCKING MORE, BOZO.

Wanna know why?

(more…)

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Drive (2011)

I have already reviewed the 1997 Drive on this website, and although the 2011 Drive vibrated my arse-cheeks faster than my dick in a blender, the 1997 Drive still remains my favourite film ever.  That is not, I REPEAT, NOT, to say that the 2011 Drive should be dismissed in any capacity.  Think of it as 1997 Drive’s less attractive sister that you would nonetheless still penetrate.  Don’t even get me started on a threesome.

So as you can tell, I fucking loved Drive.  I suppose I better tell you why.

Drive is about this bloke who drives cars and does stunts and shit for the movies.  He’s already pretty cool.  However, at night he moonlights as a getaway driver.  He’s now much cooler than you and all your shit mates put together. Then he gets involved with a right fitty who lives next door.  He’s now so cool he can put ice cubes up his bum and they don’t even melt.  Then it turns out he’s extremely proficient in the art of fucking kicking people’s heads in in elevators.  He’s so cool now that if you touch him you’ll freeze and your balls will retract so quickly you’ll sick up two little frozen purple peas and your willy will shrink so quickly a bird will start attacking your bell-end because it thinks it’s a tiny snail.

Basically, he’s FUCKING COOL. (more…)

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Drive vs Drive

So there’s a new 18 coming out called Drive – it’s got Ryan Gosling in and it’s directed by Nicolas Winding Refn (of 18s like Bronson (need) and Valhalla Rising (seen)).  It looks fucking amazing:

Doesn’t it?

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