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Machete (2010)

I’ve finally seen Machete – the film I’ve been wanting to see most this year.  When I first heard about it, I ripped a hole in my trousers, painted my dick green and ran through town making penis prints on the windows of any shops beginning with ‘M’ – that’s how excited I was.  And now I’ve seen it, but was it worth spending a night in prison?

YEAH BUDDY!

Machete was amazing from start to finish, I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face the entire way through.  As soon as it starts, Machete goes and decapitates three blokes at once – it was at this point I knew that I would like this film.  From there on in, it’s pretty much non-stop absurdity, as Machete beats people up, shoots people, uses their guts as rope, shags women, beats people up, shoots people, uses guts as rope, shags women, punches people, hits people with garden trimmers, uses guts as rope, shoots people, shags women, USES GUTS AS ROPE, kicks people, and uses some guts as a bit of rope. (more…)

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