Tag Archives: universal soldier

Ok well this looks fucking wicked

 

As I’ve told you before, I sodding well like Jean-Claude Van Damme, Dolph Lundgren and Scott Adkins. What I might not have told you is my three biggest wishes:

1) For the endless stream of women knocking on my front door to cease FOR ONCE, I need some shut eye guys, just leave me alone.

2) For my penis to be able to produce Cadbury’s creme eggs without causing pain and/or irreparable damage to my glans.

3) For Van Damme, Lundgren and Adkins to star in a film together.

Well, number one hasn’t happened yet, and neither has number two (got high hopes for it though) but guess what? Number three has fucking happened! (more…)

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People I like no. 7: Jean-Claude Van Damme

This is going to be a long post because Van Damme (aka ‘The Muscles From Brussels’ (aka ‘The Bum From Belgium’ (aka ‘The I’m consistently in films that are amazing according to the guy that writes I Only Watch 18s’))) is so dedicated to the 18-rated cause that he’s hardly ever in anything that isn’t an 18.  That means he’s been in LOADS of 18s.  Therefore, in this worthy and insightful column I will discuss, analyse and explore the most important 18s of Jean-Claude Van Damme.

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